Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor. Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy) Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you? Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb? Doctor: Then why are you so happy? Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL
Teacher: What is 5 plus 4? Mr. Bean: 9 Teacher: What is 4 plus 5? Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!
WHILE IN A DRUG STORE
Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson. Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C? Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!
QUEUING BEHIND HIS FRIEND AT AN ATM MACHINE
Friend: What are you looking at? Mr. Bean: I know your PIN number. Hee, hee! Friend: Alright, what is my PIN number if you saw it? Mr. Bean: Four asterisks!
MARRIAGE
Friend: How many women do you believe a man must marry? Mr. Bean: 16 Friend: Why? Mr. Bean: Because the priest says "4" richer, "4" poorer, "4" better and "4" worse
MOM
Mr. Bean: (crying) The doctor called, "Mom's dead". Friend: Condolence, my friend. After 2 minutes Mr. Bean cries even louder Friend: What now? Mr. Bean: My sister just called, her mom died too!
MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING
Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hours because of a power failure. Mr. Bean: Thats alright, me too. I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hours.
SPELLING LESSON
Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of 'successful' ... Is it one 'c' or two 'c's? Mr. Bean: Make it three 'c's to be sure!
